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Comedy is an escape, not from truth but from despair; a narrow escape into
faith.
Sickness:
No Excuse! We will no longer
accept your doctor's statement as proof, as we believe that if you are
able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Leave of Absence:
(For An Operation) We are no longer allowing this practice. We wish to
discourage any thought that you may have about needing an operation. We
believe that as long as you are employed here, you will need all of
whatever you have and should not consider having anything removed. We
hired you as you are and to have anything removed would certainly make you
less than we bargained for. Too much time is being spent in
the restroom. In the future, we will follow the practice of going to the
restroom in alphabetical order. For instance, those whose names being with
"A" will go from 8 a.m. to 8:05 a.m., "B" will go from 8:05 a.m. to 8:10
a.m. and so on. If you are unable to go at your time, it will be necessary
to wait until the day when your turn comes again.
Death:
(Other Than Your Own)
This is no excuse! There is nothing you can do for
them, and we are sure that someone else in a lesser position can attend to
the arrangements. However, if the funeral can be held in late afternoon,
we will be able to let you off one hour early, provided that your share of
work is ahead enough to keep the job going in your absence.
Death:
(Your Own)
This will be accepted as an excuse, but we would like a two
week notice, as we feel it is your duty to teach someone else your job.
THE MANAGEMENT
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