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Comedy

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Sick Leave Policy

Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot. (Charlie Chaplin)

 

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Comedy is an escape, not from truth but from despair; a narrow escape into faith.

 

Sickness:

No Excuse! We will no longer accept your doctor's statement as proof, as we believe that if you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Leave of Absence: (For An Operation)

We are no longer allowing this practice. We wish to discourage any thought that you may have about needing an operation. We believe that as long as you are employed here, you will need all of whatever you have and should not consider having anything removed. We hired you as you are and to have anything removed would certainly make you less than we bargained for. Too much time is being spent in the restroom. In the future, we will follow the practice of going to the restroom in alphabetical order. For instance, those whose names being with "A" will go from 8 a.m. to 8:05 a.m., "B" will go from 8:05 a.m. to 8:10 a.m. and so on. If you are unable to go at your time, it will be necessary to wait until the day when your turn comes again.

Death: (Other Than Your Own)

This is no excuse! There is nothing you can do for them, and we are sure that someone else in a lesser position can attend to the arrangements. However, if the funeral can be held in late afternoon, we will be able to let you off one hour early, provided that your share of work is ahead enough to keep the job going in your absence.

Death: (Your Own)

This will be accepted as an excuse, but we would like a two week notice, as we feel it is your duty to teach someone else your job.

THE MANAGEMENT

About Sick leave

Sick leave (or paid sick days or sick pay) is time off from work that workers can use during periods of temporary illness to stay home and address their health and safety needs without losing pay. Some workplaces offer paid sick time as a matter of workplace policy, and in few jurisdictions it is codified into law.

Potential benefits of paid sick leave

Paid sick leave advocates assert that providing paid sick time can reduce turnover, increase productivity, and reduce the spread of contamination in the workplace. Some research has shown that parents who have access to paid sick leave are more likely to take time away from work to care for their sick kids, and other research finds that most children recover faster from illness when cared for by their parents.

However, 53 percent of working mothers and 48 percent of working fathers donít have paid sick days to care for children. Without paid time off, workers may be forced to send sick children to school where they spread illness and experience negative short- and long-term health outcomes. The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) asks workers to stay at home if they are sick and to keep sick kids out of school.

Paid sick leave can also reduce the risk of occupational injuries, especially in high-risk industries such as construction, manufacturing, agriculture and health care. One study found that workers with access to paid sick leave were 28% less likely than those without to experience workplace injuries.

Source:  Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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